Phronemophobia

What’s the Matter with Kansas?

2011-09-04T00:17:00.001-05:00

I just finished re-reading Thomas Frank’s “What’s the Matter with Kansas?” I don’t want to critique the book, but I do want to share some thoughts I have as a result of reading it.

The basic idea of the book, as I interpret it, goes something like this: The blue collar working class of America consistently votes against its own economic interests by voting for Republican politicians who promote legislation that empowers corporations to decrease wages, outsource, and monopolize small businessmen out of business because those Republican politicians focus their campaigns on morality issues near and dear to the blue collar working class’s hearts. They promise to end abortion, stop gay marriage, and thwart any attempt to remove God from modern day society, but once they get into office, they don’t do any of these things; instead focusing on helping out the groups and companies who funded their campaigns in the first place. These “Conservative Republicans” vilify the “liberal elite” and convince blue collar America that they are to blame for the demoralization of America, and pit people against people in age old unwinnable arguments.

There are five main groups that Frank highlights – The Conservative Republicans, the Moderate Republicans, the Democrats, the crackpots, and the Liberal Media.

The Conservative Republicans are Frank’s bad guys. They are the two-faced snake oil salesmen; promising to bring morality back to the country while stealing money out of the working man’s pockets.

The Moderate Republicans are held mostly blameless, other than their failure to stand up against the Conservative Republicans for fear of being called traitors to the party and thus lose the favor of the voters. They are the ones who truly want to see the free market work as it was supposed to, and the ones who want to do what the Republican Party was established to do; minimize government control. This is in contrast to the Conservative Republicans, who actually want to bend the government’s control in favor of big business.

The Democrats are blamed for their abandoning of the American people in favor of corporate America; pandering to business interest in an effort to get into office.

Frank doesn’t specifically talk about the crackpots as a group, but instead highlights many of the extreme religious and moral players in the game; who are exploited by the Conservative Republicans to gain voters. They give them a voice to orate on the evils of the liberals, and are standing beside them to encourage their audience to vote Republican.

The Liberal Media, or Hollywood, presents an easy target. The Conservative Republicans refer to the things presented in films, TV, music, and print as though they represent the views of your average liberal American. This is a false representation, because Hollywood does not serve the liberals; it serves the bottom dollar, and presents whatever will sell.

This is the basic theme the book presents; a world where Democrats and Moderate Conservatives have become virtually identical, and a political system where the campaigns and platforms bear no resemblance to the actual motives and agendas of the politicians who present them.

When thinking about the current political structure in our country, I am tempted to throw my hands up and say, “The system is so corrupted that there is no reason to even try and come up with an explanation of why or to look for solutions.” But it seems to me a worthwhile thing to attempt nonetheless. So here goes.

I am first brought to the question of what government is truly supposed to do for we the average Americans. Let’s play the definition game.

Wikipedia (which I am unashamed to cite whenever it suits me) says government “refers to the legislators, administrators, and arbitrators in the administrative bureaucracy who control a state at a given time, and to the system of government by which they are organized. Government is the means by which state policy is enforced, as well as the mechanism for determining the policy of the state.” Notice it says nothing about what these policies are supposed to cover. If you go to look at the full page, you will see that it does not specify what the nature of laws are supposed to be.

Merriam-Webster has quite a few definitions for government:

the act or process of governing; specifically: authoritative direction or control
obsolete: moral conduct or behavior : discretion
the office, authority, or function of governing
obsolete: the term during which a governing official holds office
the continuous exercise of authority over and the performance of functions for a political unit : rule
the organization, machinery, or agency through which a political unit exercises authority and performs functions and which is usually classified according to the distribution of power within it b: the complex of political institutions, laws, and customs through which the function of governing is carried out
the body of persons that constitutes the governing authority of a political unit or organization: as a: the officials comprising the governing body of a political unit and constituting the organization as an active agency
capitalized: the executive branch of the United States federal government
capitalized: a small group of persons holding simultaneously the principal political executive offices of a nation or other political unit and being responsible for the direction and supervision of public affairs: (1): such a group in a parliamentary system constituted by the cabinet or by the ministry (2): administration 4b

Notice definition #2, considered obsolete. It is the only place so far where “moral conduct” is mentioned.

Let’s try “law.”

Wikipedia (numbering added by me):

“Law is a system of rules and guidelines, usually enforced through a set of institutions.

Contract law regulates everything from buying a bus ticket to trading on derivatives markets.
Property law defines rights and obligations related to the transfer and title of personal and real property.
Trust law applies to assets held for investment and financial security, while
tort law allows claims for compensation if a person's rights or property are harmed.
If the harm is criminalized in legislation or case law, criminal law offers means by which the state can prosecute the perpetrator.
Constitutional law provides a framework for the creation of law, the protection of human rights and the election of political representatives.
Administrative law is used to review the decisions of government agencies, while
international law governs affairs between sovereign states in activities ranging from trade to environmental regulation or military action.

“Legal systems elaborate rights and responsibilities in a variety of ways. A general distinction can be made between civil law jurisdictions, which codify their laws, and common law systems, where judge made law is not consolidated. In some countries, religion informs the law. Law provides a rich source of scholarly inquiry, into legal history, philosophy, economic analysis or sociology. Law also raises important and complex issues concerning equality, fairness and justice.”

In the highlighted sentence above, we see the first reference to religion. Although I am at a loss as for what that exactly means. How does religion “inform” the law?

Merriam-Webster:

“a binding custom or practice of a community : a rule of conduct or action prescribed or formally recognized as binding or enforced by a controlling authority
the whole body of such customs, practices, or rules
common law: the body of law developed in England primarily from judicial decisions based on custom and precedent, unwritten in statute or code, and constituting the basis of the English legal system and of the system in all of the United States except Louisiana
the control brought about by the existence or enforcement of such law
the action of laws considered as a means of redressing wrongs; also: litigation
the agency of or an agent of established law
a rule or order that it is advisable or obligatory to observe
something compatible with or enforceable by established law
control, authority
often capitalized: the revelation of the will of God set forth in the Old Testament
capitalized: the first part of the Jewish scriptures : pentateuch, torah
a rule of construction or procedure <the laws of poetry>
the whole body of laws relating to one subject
the legal profession
law as a department of knowledge : jurisprudence
legal knowledge
a statement of an order or relation of phenomena that so far as is known is invariable under the given conditions
a general relation proved or assumed to hold between mathematical or logical expressions”

In this list of definitions, we seem to find three main kinds of law:

Laws enforced by government
Religious Law
Scientific Law

So, what’s the difference between the three? What kinds of things is it appropriate for the government to govern? What kinds of laws are the jurisdiction of the government?

At the risk of oversimplifying, I think this is the very heart of the matter. What is the responsibility of the government, what is the responsibility of religion, and what is the responsibility of science?

In my next installment, I wish to discuss the separation of church and state. The question is this; can we separate what a governing body has authority over and what our religious leaders do? Is it possible to separate what God and what The Man have the right to dictate to us?

Oh Nook, Where Art Thou?

2011-06-13T10:22:00.002-05:00

So, for my birthday/father's day, my family got together and got me some Barnes and Noble gift cards, because they knew I wanted a Nook.

My birthday was Thursday. Friday I called our local Barnes and Noble, and discovered that they did not have said Nook in stock, and that they would not have it until the 16th at the earliest. So, I decided to order online.

Shortly after lunchtime on Friday, I ordered the Nook, and was told the estimated delivery date would be Wednesday the 15th. I figured that they were over-estimating how long it would take to deliver just to be on the safe side.

I get an email later in the day from B&N telling me my order has shipped, and giving me a tracking number to follow the shipment on the UPS site. Needless to say I am excited. If it shipped on Friday, then I might see it as early as Monday, right?

I check the UPS site, and it tells me this: "A UPS shipping label has been created. Once the shipment arrives at our facility, the tracking status--including the scheduled delivery date--will be updated." As of a few minutes ago, it is still telling me this.

I went back to the Barnes and Noble site to check the status of my order, and it tells me that the item was shipped on Friday.

Who is telling the truth?

Does Barnes and Noble consider the item "shipped" if they've printed up a label, slapped it on a box, and stuck it in a stack to be loaded on a truck eventually? Does UPS just not update it's tracking info as quickly as they should?

Are they deliberately toying with my emotions?

Haiku - 03-29-2011

2011-03-29T15:11:00.000-05:00

USB drive, and
Keys with my pocket change, and
Wallet, lint, and hair

Random Internet Search–03-17-2011

2011-03-17T00:10:00.001-05:00

The Phrase Is:

“the most amazing video ever”

Yahoo results:

The most amazing and funniest dance 2010-best dance ever 2010-best

Google results:

Uh, whatever.

Bing results:

The most amazing and funniest dance 2010-best dance ever 2010-best

Umm… did someone change the meaning of the word “amazing” and not tell me?

Winner: None.

Haiku–03-16-2011

2011-03-16T22:33:00.001-05:00

Properly greatest

Tolerably rapturous

Reasonable text

Haiku–03-15-2011

2011-03-15T21:52:00.001-05:00

My shoes are stinky

The socks only help somewhat

I need foot powder

Hey Look, I’m Following Myself!

2011-03-15T00:29:00.001-05:00

This Page Intentionally Left Blank

2011-03-15T00:20:00.001-05:00

Are we really so stupid that we have to be told that a page doesn’t have anything on it? Or is it the paranoia factor? Is this statement designed to comfort those of us who will fear a printer glitch or an electronic hiccup?
You cannot print “This Page Intentionally Left Blank” without actually negating the statement. It is like printing “This sentence is not really printed here.” I fear that excessive use of this publishing convention may actually lead to a paradox that will untwist the very Twizzler of reality.
In a society narcissisticly obsessed with “going green,” isn’t this a real step backwards? Might as well print, “So what if we totally just wasted a piece of paper? Suck it.” (And yeah, I did just make up the word “narcissisticly.” Start using it everywhere. I want to get it into Webster,s. Team Phronemophobia Go!)
When I get around to writing another book, it will be entitled, “This Page Intentionally Left Blank.” Doesn’t matter what the book is about. That is what will be on the cover. In Times New Roman Eighteen Point, charcoal black on an ivory background. And my name penned in red in my handwriting below it. I am starting a new trend where I create the book jacket first, then decide what the binding will look like, what page layout will be used internally, how many drafts it should go through before completion, what electronic media will be used to type and store it, the final first draft, the character maps and notes, the treatment, the outline, the brainstorming sessions, and then, finally, the actual subject of the book. I fully expect an international bestseller.

Haiku–03-14-2011

2011-03-14T23:51:00.001-05:00

I like to eat meat

It does not make me evil

It makes me human

Work Jargon

2010-09-23T19:07:00.000-05:00

I was thinking about all the special terminology we use at work, and how this specific use of language can create a culture among the people who use it. Here's some of the jargon I use at work every day:

Business Needs and Functional Overview
Technical Design Specifications
Testing Strategy
Test Plan
Test Case
Issue Log
Project Plan
Issue Escalation
Gap Analysis
Dashboard
Business Intelligence
Quality Assurance
Requirements Analysis
Data Quality Certification
Common Core Standards
Retired ID
Deidentified ID
Restricted Use Data
User Acceptance Testing
System Testing
Application Testing
Unit Testing
Code Library
User Interface Standards
Data Mart
Extract, Transform, Load Procedure
Data Verification
Web Accessibility Compliance
Operational Data Store
Data Warehouse
Common Authentication
Roles and Responsibilities
Risk Evaluation Matrix
Source Code Control

Anyone want to guess what I do?

One versus Many

2010-03-22T09:30:00.004-05:00

What is it about human nature that causes each of us to see him/herself as the exception to the rule?

Why do we spend so much time dealing with the people along the margins?

Is it reasonable to consider a system a failure because it does not work for a tiny majority?

At what point is it okay to say, ''Sorry, but the system can't help you?''

Discuss amongst yourselves.

Give me a To Be Continued

2010-03-19T20:17:00.000-05:00

Just got done playing action figures with my son, who will be 9 next month.

Some observations...

He likes to say, "And then suddenly..." a lot.

He is an excellent storyteller. Usually playing pretend gtames with him really means that I serve as the stagehand and (more importantly) the audience. He is the director, set designer, and all other major creative roles.

His time on the Wii and the computer is evident in his play; as most games include cut scenes between major "levels," the battles usually involve a set pattern of interaction and rules that have to be followed, and there are a variety of multiplayer options available.

His time watching TV is also evident in his play. There are plots, subplots, distinct characterizations for each player, good guys, bad guys, a challenge that has to be faced, and everything else you need for a good tale.

And this is also where I find my "out" when either my attention span has been exceeded or there is something else I really need to do. Instead of telling him I can't play anymore, I say "I need to get up off the floor now, bud. Give me a To Be Continued."

He then proceeds to carry the story forward to an appropriately climactic moment, and gives me the requested "To Be Continued." And he usually seems perfectly satisfied that this is the right way to end the game. For the time being, anyway.

I think the boy has quite a future in writing or storytelling of some kind.

To be continued...

2009-11-28T10:49:00.001-06:00

Checking to see if I can still blog from my phone.

2009-09-02T16:27:00.003-05:00

www.tedcarter.net-tvartwalk.html - tc

2009-09-02T16:27:00.001-05:00

www.tedcarter.net-tvartwalk.html - tc

2009-09-02T16:25:00.001-05:00

Don't forget about the Art Walk this Friday! - tc

2009-07-09T15:55:00.001-05:00

I wonder if there is a relationship between meetings per day and nightmares per night...-Ted

2009-06-09T14:19:00.001-05:00

I'm wondering just how much you can really say in 160 characters or less. Apparently more than I realized. Wow. I still have 30 to go. Hmm... Goodbye all!!

2009-06-04T09:37:00.001-05:00

I now can make blog posts from my phone. Aren't i cool?

Advertising

2009-06-04T09:11:00.001-05:00

Hey.

I've enabled advertising on my blogger site because I'm curious about how accurate their tracking engines are. Will the ads they show below my posts really apply to what I posted about?

Only time will tell...

2009-06-04T09:02:00.001-05:00

Testing.

Of Hard Drives and R2-D2

2009-04-14T08:55:00.002-05:00

This weekend, I erased a piece of the Carter Family's memory.

In 2001, Santa brought the family a shiny new Compaq Presario desktop. It was, for all intents and purposes, the first computer for both of our kids. They grew up on this machine.

Then a couple of years ago, a shiny new Dell came along, and the Compaq got very, very lonely. I was essentially it's only user, and I only used it to update the checkbook in Quicken and do the taxes in TaxAct once a year. No one else in the family could tolerate the computer any more, because over the years it has gotten SLOW.

So finally after debate and discussion, I decided to reformat the hard drive and start over. I had long since removed all of the important personal files, saved games, and so forth. They either moved to the new desktop for use or got archived onto the external hard drive in case we ever wanted to get at them again.

This weekend I found the Compaq recovery disc and restored the computer to the original factory pre-installed software. Windows XP and not much else. Had to run through Windows Update about a million times; amazing how many layers of updates you need to get a version of XP from 2001 up to speed.

As I was doing this, I had to admit that I felt a little pang of sadness. I started thinking about the system folder on that old computer. What did the cookies and old orphaned application resource say about the time we spent on it? Preference files that told of games and learning software long gone by. Logs that told of the hours spent, the things discovered, the enjoyment had.

In essence, I felt bad because I was erasing the computer's memories, not just erasing it's memory.

Then I started thinking about R2-D2. When the new batch of Star Wars movies came out, they introduced a lot of nonsense and if you are a real Star Wars buff I am sure you would love to debate with me ad nauseum regarding the pros and cons of Episodes I, II, and III. But let's not, okay?

The piece of the new stories I find fascinating is the notion that, though C-3PO's memory gets erased at the end of Episode III, R2's does not. So, R2 starts as a droid in the service of Queen Amidala, then is "adopted" by Anakin Skywaker, who turns to the Dark Side and becomes Darth Vader. R2 stays with Amidala until her death, and then follows her girl child Lea when she is adopted by Senator Organa. (Yeah, I can be as geeky as the next guy if properly motivated). Years later he is adopted by Luke Skywalker and makes great contribution fighting his former master Darth. This was really brought to my attention after I watched a few Clone Wars Cartoon episodes with my son. Anakin even jeapordizes a mission to save R2 even though he was instructed to leave him behind.

So R2 carried the entire Star Wars saga in his computer brain; more than any other main character could say. He was already my favorite character from the franchise, but this fact drove that home for me.

Anyway, my old Compaq will never fight the forces of evil, and will never shed a tear for the memories I took from it, but I still can't help but feel a little saddened to know that they are gone.

But I'm glad to have another computer that can actually be used again...

Online Banking

2009-04-10T08:48:00.002-05:00

Trying to decide if I really need a full version of Quicken on my home computer since the online services provided by our bank have gotten so much better, and the lag time between when I write a check or use my debit card to when it shows up on my transaction list is virtually gone. Plus there is an online version of Quicken that doesn't require software purchases and can be accessed from anywhere. Amazing how quickly things change. Not saying I'm going to miss the hours spent entering the info from receipts piled in the corner of desk, but still.

Facebook versus Email Induced Schizophrenia

2009-04-02T12:28:00.003-05:00

Schizophrenia, according to the DSM-IV, is:

a severe mental illness characterized by a variety of symptoms including but not limited to:

loss of contact with reality
bizarre behavior
disorganized thinking
disorganized speech
decreased emotional expressiveness
diminished or loss of contact with reality
diminished to total social withdrawal.

I believe that Yahoo and Facebook have unintentionally caused me a mild form of schizophrenia, and I am contemplating asking the companies for some compensation. Here is my rationale:

Loss of contact with reality: I spend so much time emailing and checking facebook that I don't have time to interact with other humans within the same setting as myself.
Bizarre behavior: I find myself sending people messages on Facebook and then emailing them to let them know that I have just sent them a message on Facebook. Or vice-versa.
Disorganized thinking: I can't remember who is my facebook friend, who I can chat with on Yahoo, who of my contacts I know from school, work, or I said I'd be there friend just because I liked their profile pic. I can't remember where I posted that picture of the thing, where I saw the notice about that event, or where I put that blog entry I had been working on.
Disorganized speech: See #1. I spend so much less time talking face-to-face with people now that I have forgotten how. I find my fingers moving along with my mouth as I try to speak and "air-type" the words I am saying at the same time.
Decreased emotional expressiveness: As we all know, it is very difficult to convey emotion when typing online, so I have worked to make my messages as emotionless and direct as possible. As a consequence, I have found myself losing the ability to emote in real life.
Diminished or loss of contact with reality: See #1. I have this irrational fear that if I leave a profile picture posted for too long, I will look like that forever no matter how many times I try to change the picture afterwards. I am starting to believe that it is unsafe for me to talk to people in the real world unless they are on my friends list. I keep asking the checkout clerks at Hy-Vee if they accept PayPal...
Diminished to total social withdrawal: See #1. How can I go out and meet people when I have so many email/facebook messages/wall postings to respond to? I simply don't have time!!!!

What do you think? Do I have a case?

Personal Web Sites

2009-03-30T12:18:00.004-05:00

Today's Topic: Personal Websites - Essential nexus of online identity, or sad outcome of an overdeveloped ego?

I created my own website this weekend (http://www.tedcarter.net). I did it because Yahoo kept enticing me with a $2 annual domain name registration and then sweet-talked me into a one month hosting plan for $12 beyond that.

Here are my rationales:

As noted in an earlier post, I felt the need to have a central place where I could keep track of all of the places where I have a presence online.
I wanted to have a place to post information about events and projects going on in my life.
I wanted to be free of the restraints of the other places where I have a presence online but am unable to present myself as I really want to. Facebook is a great communication tool, photography.com is a good place to display work, etc. But each has it's restrictions and conditions that prevent me from presenting myself as I really intend to.
I wanted to be able to provide friends a place to post if they needed to get something online and, for whatever reason, didn't want to go through an established site.
Some of the preformatted/free web hosting services force you to provide a lot of personal information and display this information prominently on your site. I don't know that my physical address and phone number are things I want to share with just anyone.

Anyway, what do you think? Good idea or not?

Embracing Egocentricity

2009-03-28T21:36:00.002-05:00

Okay, so lots and lots and lots going on in my world; both in the sense of my surroundings (family, work, home, favorite TV shows, etc.) and in the sense of my internal world (mind, creative juices, potential projects, ideas, dreams, etc.).

I think that I have failed to write in my blog as much as I could because I strive to find something interesting to say. But a lesson I learned about writing a long time ago should apply to blogging as well as works of formal composition. It's the same lesson I follow with my photography; do a LOT of it, and even if a lot of the results are crap, there are going to be some really good things in there, too.

So I am embracing egocentricity. I will write about me unabashedly, without fear that what I say is stupid, egotistical, or pointless.

You have been warned.

Who's the Boss?

2009-02-21T23:41:00.002-06:00

So I went to my supervisor's training this week, and got some useful information, but I continue to ponder the nature of corporate hierarchies, and want to know what you think.

Years ago, I was an executive director in charge of a small nonprofit agency with a huge budget that did licensure testing for dentists and dental hygienists. It was an odd position to be in, because the board of the organization was very involved, and I came to realize that I was really more of an executive secretary than I was a director. Unfortunately I learned this the hard way by overstepping the bounds that the board felt were appropriate for me to do, and the rest is history, as they say.

Since then, I was quite content to be a worker bee and focus on doing the best I could in whatever job I had. Until last year when I was asked to become a supervisor. Since then the number of folks I am responsible for has grown to about nine or ten, so I spend a lot of my time at work focusing on management issues rather than the hands-on work that I am used to.

I have always questioned authority; and by that I don't mean the people in authority, but just the notion of authority in general. I have lots of hippie influences in my life, and like to believe that essentially no person is greater than another.

In the workplace, however, I have come to realize that these authority structures are necessary simply because nothing gets done by committee. You can discuss and debate until you are blue in the face, but in the end someone has to have the power to say, "Here's what we are going to do."

There are a lot of very smart and very opinionated folks working for and with me, and although we couldn't get anything done without their involvement, there are numerous times when different people have very different perspectives on how things should be done. I have tried to be as democratic as I can in my approach to these situations, but find that eventually you have to choose a path and go down it; whether it is the one that everyone would agree on or not.

When I first became a parent, I told myself that I would never use the phrase, "because I said so." Nonetheless, years later I have realized that even when you give the best reason for any decision, sometimes your children don't agree, and you end up with no alternative but this dreaded phrase. The workplace is no different.

So I've been wrestling with different terms to use in order to frame my approach to supervision. "The Boss" seems archaic and implies leadership with no input. So that one's out. But then you go to the other extreme with terms like "Supporter" and you imply that you are there to lend assistance but not to tell them, under any circumstances, what to do.

When I think about government, I think about democracy and the notion that our elected officials work for us, and not the other way around. They are not there to tell us what to do; but instead to listen to our needs and wants, and try to shape our systems accordingly. But that isn't entirely true, is it? Otherwise we would have no police force, no military, and no hard and fast laws to speak of. As much as a liberal like me hates to admit it, sometimes even the government has to say, "do it because I said so."

Corporate structures are even a few steps closer to a monarchy that we'd probably like to admit; because the director of a company or team is the absolute ruler of the staff that he or she is responsible for. They are under no obligation to take the opinions or wants of their staff into consideration when making decisions. Good ones do, but beyond ensuring that staff don't quit or sue due to dissatisfaction, their are no rules that say they have to.

Of course, in most situations, bosses have bosses to answer to as well, so there is a give-and-take on how much power you exert relative to how you will be held accountable for it. In my situation, I am one of five supervisors working directly under a team director who answers to a commissioner and deputy commissioner who in turn answer to a board. So I am at least four steps down the ladder.

The term supervisor itself doesn't seem to help me much. It implies that I watch over folks, but doesn't give much indication of what I am supposed to do beyond observation. Manager suggests that I "manage" things, but this could mean any number of things.

After my training, I landed on the term "coach," and think that it works fairly well. A coach is there to help his/her players perform at the top of their game. To provide the tools, skills, and motivation to be the best. But at the end of the day, they are still calling the shots. The only part of this analogy that doesn't work for me is that most coaches don't also suit up and go out on the field, whereas I have to. If supervising were the only thing on my plate, it would be different, but I am still responsible for getting a lot of work done on my own. And honestly, I prefer it that way.

In any case, it is a topic that I continue to debate. What do you think? Those of you that are bosses or have bosses, what do you think is the best approach?

The Ultimate Supervisor

2009-02-18T12:17:00.002-06:00

That's Right! Tomorrow I will "discover the essential skills and techniques to bring out the best in [my] employees!"

I will learn "how leading people differs from 'being the boss.'"
I will learn "strategies for prioritizing tasks for [myself] and [my] employees when everything's 'due yesterday.'"
I will learn how to use "performance appraisals as a motivational tool."
I will learn "how to help [my] people through the basic change cycle."
I will learn "how to 'sell' [my] ideas and solutions to peers and higher-ups to get results."

So, in short, after tomorrow's one day Fred Pryor seminar that the State is sending me to, I will be prepared to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!

I'm very excited. Can't you tell? (Note the sarcastic slant of the font.)

For more information, visit www.careertrack.com.

Recession

2009-02-13T15:45:00.002-06:00

Quick Questions:

Does anyone else feel like the recession is based entirely on fear and paranoia and not on any real economic basis?

Does anyone else think it's weird that we didn't really hear a lot about "economic crisis" beyond gas prices until after the gas prices dropped suddenly?

Does anyone else doubt that Bush's impending exit and the sudden ramping up of recession propaganda happened at the same time?

Does anyone else find it disturbing that, when asked why someone lost their job, is losing their home, or can't find money to feed the family, we accept the answer of "we're in a recession" as though it were a real answer?

Just curious.

Shame, shame.

2009-02-07T01:36:00.003-06:00

What? Not three posts into my blog renaissance, and I'm already thinking about copying and pasting something I already posted on Facebook?

That is shameful.

You slacker.

Can't come up with anything new, so you're just going to recycle a list of twenty-five things about you that you did on Facebook because people wouldn't stop tagging you?

Say it isn't so.

I'm so embarrassed.

I shouldn't.

But I already copied it out of FB. All I have to do is hit Ctrl+V and it'll be here.

But what if someone actually comes to read the post, and realizes what a cheap charlatan I am? That I am only posting this again in the vain hope that anyone who didn't see it on Facebook would see it here?

How can live with myself if I do it?

1. I love gadgets. My basement office is filled with new or old MP3 Players, PalmPilots, Wireless Keyboards, Digital Photo Keychains, Mini Digital Cameras, and other items that seemed really cool at the time of purchase, but now go unused and neglected. My Sansa Player and my Canon Digital Camera are the only two current exceptions to that rule.

2. I've become a schizophrenic book reader. I am currently reading four books; "The Stand" by Stephen King, "Watchmen" by Alan Moore, "Why We Suck" by Dr. Denis Leary, and "The Way of the World" by Ron Suskind. Not to mention various magazines and comic books.

3. I used to be terrified of both heights and the dark, and now really enjoy being in high places and can't sleep if the lights are on.

4. I usually carry all my stress in my stomach, but lately it's been creeping into my head and shoulders, too.

5. I did not manage to stay friends with any of my ex-girlfriends.

6. I am an avid comic book geek, but didn't become one until I was in graduate school.

7. I am on item seven, and am already worried that I am not going to be able to come up with 25 interesting things to say about myself.

8. A couple of years ago I managed to lose about 50 pounds of weight that had been growing since my wife was pregnant with our daughter Bailey thirteen years ago, and am now really paranoid about the fact that I have gained about 10 of those pounds back.

9. I've written two novels, and got one published through a print-on-demand publisher, and haven't written anything since because they were both crap.

10. I love taking black-and-white digital photos. I prefer architecture and nature photos to photos of people.

11. U2 is my favorite band and has been since the 80's. I also love the Pogues, R.E.M., Green Day, Tori Amos, Jason Mraz, Alanis, Pink, Avril, and too many others to name.

12. My current favorite TV shows are "Chuck" and "Heroes."

13. I don't remember very many of my dreams anymore.

14. I have two children, whom I love more than anything, but don't think you could pay me enough to have a third.

15. I went to graduate school and got a Master's in Educational Psychology with a focus on Educational Program Evaluation. Despite this, a decade later I work for the IT team of the Kansas State Department of Education as a Data Manager focusing on overseeing software application testing, training, and requirements documentation. S'funny how we don't end up anywhere near where we thought we'd end up when we left school.

16. I'm having a hard time with the realization that, though we live in a democratic society, the business world is a monarchy by nature. Hard enough to deal with when you are a subordinate; I feel like it can be even harder when you have to be a member of the ruling class. Hard to be in a position of authority when you have some misgivings about the notion of authority in general.

17. Despite the fact that almost every member of my family is a devout Republican, I vote Democrat on most things, and am VERY excited that Bush is out and Obama is in. We just tend not to talk politics when I visit my folks...

18. I pledged a fraternity while I was at Rockhurst, and made it all the way through pledge week before I decided it wasn't right for me. And that was back when pledges still got tied up and blindfolded and left in a field to find there way back home.

19. I was once cast as Lancelot in a production of Camelot and turned down the part because I didn't think there was any way I could pull it off.

20. The three charitable organizations I regularly contribute to are the Save Darfur Coalition (http://www.savedarfur.org), the Human Rights Campaign (http://www.hrc.org/), and Greenpeace (http://www.greenpeace.org/usa/).

21. I'm married to a woman who should have been a hippie in the 60's. She is unquestionably the best thing that ever happened to me, and has helped me grow in ways I am sure I can't even imagine.

22. I acted, sang, and danced in Renaissance Festivals for something like seven years in High School and College. Which means I frequently wore tights and skirts.

23. I have never been further outside the US than Canada (Vancouver) and Mexico (Cancun). I would someday love to visit the British Isles.

24. I wish I knew more about my specific genealogy than I do. I am apparently descended from "a little of everything," to quote my father.

25. Having made it to 25, I have to say it was a lot more fun reading other peoples' posts than it was writing my own!

Oops. I went ahead and hit that Ctrl+V. I should erase it.

But it's already here.

Maybe I'll just post it.

Should I?

Where do I live?

2009-02-05T23:27:00.013-06:00

I love my yahoo mail account (tedcarter@yahoo.com). I've had it for years. And for awhile, it was enough. There were games and stuff to do on Yahoo. That was fun. And I got in early, so I got an email address that was actually just my name and no random digits following it. So I was happy.

Then came blogger, and blogger was good (http://retracted.blogspot.com/). I wrote stuff, I made friends, I catered to my ego in a safe and comfortable way.

I'm not going to pretend to know the sequence of the web accounts that followed. I didn't really have a plan for establishing my virtual home; I just kind of added rooms here and there as I stumbled across them, or a friend suggested I join, or they just magically appeared one day; I opened one cyber door in my ever-expanding residence, and voila! Suddenly I was able to post photos or play checkers with people in Tokyo or who knows what else.

Fast forward to today. I re-discovered Blogger after over a year of having the room sit and collect dust. Perfectly good place to spend some of my time at home. Dust was swept out of corners, cobwebs blown away, and I am redecorating the room so that I can hang out here again.

Then my daughter asks me if she can join Bebo. I vaguely remember Bebo, but am not sure of all of the particulars and how child-friendly it is. So I tell her that I need to check it out before I will allow her to join. I go there, and can't find an account. So what do I do? I join (http://www.bebo.com/TedC935). Another addition. (BTW, if any of you have opinions as to the appropriateness of Bebo for pre-teen girls, let me know. The jury's still out.)

I do a lot of photography. It's a hobby that has helped relieve the stress and fill the time on countless occasions. Initially, I found Photo.net and set myself up an account where I could share what I had come up with and see what others thought (http://photo.net/photos/Ted Carter). Spent a lot of time there, sharing and providing feedback. But, after some time, it seemed that politics took over the site, and so myself and some others felt the need to move to a new place to share and get input. So I set up an account on Photopoints.com (http://www.photopoints.com/main/photos/photographer.aspx?ID=17930). Then both sites realized that it would be smart to give the photographers who post there a way to show their photos to the outside world in a more professional manner, so they gave me new sites to play with (http://tedcarter.photography.com and http://tedcarter.ephotosites.com).

As if this weren't enough in the realm of photos, I got a Picasa web account with my Google mail account, which I had to get in order to post photos of my son's Cub Scout Pack to the pack's Picasa web albums. So, there's the Picasa web albums themselves (http://picasaweb.google.com/tedpcarter). Then there is the google mail account (tedpcarter@gmail.com). There are also other Google services I use like Google Docs (http://docs.google.com/) and others.

I also picked up a Photobucket account along the way somewhere; I think it was for this blog (http://s307.photobucket.com/albums/nn288/retracted/).

Let us not forget StoryBall (http://www.storyball.org/Main/HomePage). I was very lucky to be involved to participate in a group writing project with some very talented writers, so though it is not an ongoing membership type of site, I feel that I left a lot of myself in the stories I wrote and published there.

Then we have MySpace, which was very exciting when I first joined (http://www.myspace.com/retrac_ted). But then, seemingly overnight, all the cool kids moved to Facebook, so I did, too (http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/profile.php?id=1078325534&ref=profile).

I am sure there are many more that I just can't think of at the moment, but the above list illustrates my point. Those of us who spend any amount of time in cyberspace leave a footprint there. What I wonder is what that footprint says about us. It is so easy to sign up for an account here or a username there without putting too much stock into the gesture. But who we are is partially defined by how we present ourselves to others; because this colors how others interact with us and therefore alters our own behaviors. And as we spend more and more time interacting online, how much of ourselves do we truly have invested in the electronic scribbles we leave along the way?

I realize that, left to my own devices, my physical home would no doubt be as random and as haphazard as my digital home currently is. And though I doubt I will ever be one of those people who is able to organize themselves well enough to present a unified and consistent impression of himself in his online personas, and I am not really that worried about it. I am just suggesting that maybe we need to think a little more about who we are online, and in turn, how much we can really discern about others based on their digital selves.

New Dream Car

2009-02-05T10:49:00.002-06:00

So, I am not a car nut in any way. Both of my grandfathers, my father, and my brother worked for General Motors for many years, but the mechanic gene seemed to have passed me by. I would have difficulty figuring out how to change my own oil; despite numerous tutorials on the topic.

In addition, I am beyond disgusted with the American Automotive Industry and their connections to the Oil Barons and the fact that I personally blame them and the Bush Administration for all of the financial woes our country is currently experiencing; both real and imagined.

All that being said, I have a new dream car:

http://www.dodge.com/en/2009/charger/

Due to memories of The General Lee from my childhood, and more recently from Death Proof, I have always loved the Dodge Charger. When I used to play Midtown Madness to relieve stress, that was the car I always chose.

And on my way to work this morning, I followed a new Charger onto the highway and nearly ran off the road oogling it.

So, I know it is totally un-PC of me to want one. And as a parent, it is not very practical either. But why would they call them "dreams" if they were completely logical and reasonable, right?

What I've Learned about Blogging

2009-02-04T13:18:00.002-06:00

As I get back into the world of Blogging, I thought I should make a list of all the valuable lessons I learned the last time I blogged. Here they are, in no particular order:

A blog is not a diary. Other people read it. Sometimes the ones you don't want to.
I'm usually less funny when I'm trying to be.
I'm not nearly as creative as I'd like to think I am.
Do not, under any circumstances, talk about your relationship with your spouse unless:
You are being exceedingly flattering, or
You like sleeping on the couch.
There are at least three viewpoints for any given situation, and you sound like an idiot if you rant on and on and don't attempt to acknowledge at least one of those alternate views.
Don't talk about people at work. Turns out they have computers, too.
Less is usually more, but sometimes more really is more.
Sarcasm seldom translates accurately to the written word.

I'm sure there are more, but those are going to be the ones I keep in mind for the time being as I write.

That being said, I feel the right to type whatever I want, whenever I want, and about whomever I want. I just know that if I do, I have to be prepared to suffer the consequences.

So, about my wife...

;-)

I'm Back

2009-02-02T14:56:00.001-06:00

Just thought I'd warn you. The blogging world will no longer be safe.

More to come...

The Boy Scouts and Schools - Mandated Discrimination

2007-04-11T10:49:00.000-05:00

I have a couple of official statements to share with you. The first is from the Office of Civil Rights:

Boy Scouts of America Equal Access Act

On January 8, 2002, President George W. Bush signed the No Child Left Behind Act of 2001. Part of No Child Left Behind is the Boy Scouts of America Equal Access Act, Section 9525 of the Elementary and Secondary Education Act of 1965, as amended by Section 901 of the No Child Left Behind Act of 2001 (the Boy Scouts Act), which applies to public elementary and secondary schools, local educational agencies (LEAs), and State educational agencies (SEAs) that receive funds made available through the Department of Education. Under the Boy Scouts Act, which became effective on January 8, 2002, no such public school, LEA or SEA that provides an opportunity for one or more outside youth or community groups to meet on school premises or in school facilities before or after school hours shall deny equal access or a fair opportunity to meet to, or discriminate against, any group officially affiliated with the Boy Scouts of America, or any other youth group listed in Title 36 of the United States Code as a patriotic society.

The second is an official resolution from the Boy Scouts of America on February 2, 2002:

Boy Scouts of America Resolution

WHEREAS, the Resolutions Committee of the Boy Scouts of America (on behalf of the Executive Board of the Boy Scouts of America) on June 1, 2001, assigned the Relationships Committee of the Boy Scouts of America with the responsibility for considering and making recommendations to the Executive Board with respect to various resolutions submitted by members of the National Council at the annual meeting concerning the appropriate flexibility to be employed by the Boy Scouts of America in establishing standards for leadership; and
WHEREAS, the Relationships Committee duly formed a Task Force on Resolutions, composed of a cross section of representatives from religious and civic chartered organizations and others represented in Scouting, to consider these resolutions and make recommendations to the Relationships Committee; and
WHEREAS, the Task Force has reported the results of its thoughtful and extensive deliberations to the Relationships Committee, which submitted the report to the Relationships/Marketing Group Committee, both of these committees having approved and adopted the Report of the Task Force on Resolutions as their own; and
WHEREAS, the national officers, having received and considered the Report, unanimously adopt the recommendations of the Report without reservation; and
WHEREAS, the national officers agree with the report that "duty to God is not a mere ideal for those choosing to associate with the Boy Scouts of America; it is an obligation," which has defined good character for youth of Scouting age throughout Scouting's 92-year history and that the Boy Scouts of America has made a commitment "to provide faith-based values to its constituency in a respectful manner;" and
WHEREAS, the national officers agree that "conduct of both Scouts and Scouters must be in compliance with the Scout Oath and Law" and that "membership is contingent upon one's willingness to accept the values and standards espoused by the Boy Scouts of America," and
WHEREAS the national officers further agree that homosexual conduct is inconsistent with the traditional values espoused in the Scout Oath and Law and that an avowed homosexual cannot serve as a role model for the values of the Oath and Law; and
WHEREAS, the national officers reaffirm that, as a national organization whose very reason for existence is to instill and reinforce values in youth, the BSA's values cannot be subject to local option choices, but must be the same in every unit; and
WHEREAS, the Boy Scouts of America respects the right of persons and individuals to hold values and standards different than the Boy Scouts of America, the national officers also agree that the Boy Scouts of America is entitled to expect that persons and organizations with different values and standards will nevertheless respect those of the Boy Scouts of America;
THEREFORE, the national officers recommend the National Executive Board affirm that the Boy Scouts of America shall continue to follow its traditional values and standards of leadership.

So, federal law says that schools must allow religious organizations that discriminate against homosexuals use of public education facilities for their meetings.

What a wonderful country we live in. As a former Boy Scout, and a parent who had hoped to one day encourage his own son to join the Boy Scouts, I cannot tell you how much this saddens me. I wonder how my former Scout Master would feel about this.

Blind, ignorant people. Fearing what they don't understand. So sad.

Sneak Peek - Pulitzer of the Future

2007-04-06T12:48:00.000-05:00

The pictures below are a book that Child #2 wrote as part of a local PBS/Reading Rainbow young authors and illustrators contest. The artwork and story are all his work. Enjoy!

Veto This, Mr. Bush!

2007-03-29T15:14:00.000-05:00

I am filled with disgust and ire after reading the news about the President's plan to veto the bill passed by the Senate requiring a timetable for withdrawing troops.

The argument against it? We can't restrict the commanders' ability to do their jobs. WTF?

The whole point of the bill is that there is no longer a job to do over there; we've pretty much botched up as much as we possibly can, and it is time for us to get the heck out of there before any more lives are lost over who controls the petroleum.

So Bush comes back and says "We stand united in saying loud and clear that when we've got a troop in harm's way, we expect that troop to be fully funded."

I kid you not; that's what he said.

Here's an idea, Georgie; STOP PUTTING SOLDIERS IN HARM'S WAY! How about that? Bring our citizens home and move on beyond this five year debacle that you've created so that your oil buddies back home can add some more rooms onto their ranches.

Disgusting. How can we as a people be so easily misled by someone who comes across as such a complete doofus? Just listen to the man speak. I've dealt with house pets that I'm convinced are smarter than he is. And yet, we've allowed he and his buddies to spend more than $350 billion on this ridiculous war.

Lets talk about what more than $350 billion could have done if put towards alternative fuel research. Or cooperative agreements with oil-producing countries. Or anything other than blowing up villiage after villiage of Iraquis who have done nothing to us.

Okay, I'm done with my soapbox. For now.

Sheesh.

Today's Poll: Character Education / Emotional Intelligence

2007-03-29T14:03:00.000-05:00

I just read an article about teaching character education in schools. It's a hot topic in education these days.

The upside is that educators are acknowledging the importance of concepts outside of the typical IQ or academic achievement realm.

The downside is that it is a dangerous slope towards mandating a specific morality. Do you really want you children tested on the Ten Commandments in public school?

What do you think?

Why Don't We Listen to Scientists?

2007-03-26T10:35:00.000-05:00

The following is an excerpt from an article entitled "Skill Formation and the Economics of Investing in Disadvantaged Children" from Science Magazine, June 30th, '06, written by James J. Heckman. (http://www.sciencemag.org)

"Four core concepts important to devising sound social policy toward early childhood have emerged from decades of independent research in economics, neuroscience, and developmental psychology:

First, the architecture of the brain and the process of skill formation are influenced by an interaction between genetics and individual experience.
Second, the mastery of skills that are essential for economic success an the development of their underlying neural pathways follow hierarchical rules. Later attainments build on foundations that are laid down earlier.
Third, cognitive, linguistic, social, and emotional competencies are interdependent; all are shaped powerfully by the experiences of the developing child; and all contribute to success in the society at large.
Fourth, although adaptation continues throughout life, human abilities are formed in a predictable sequence of sensitive periods; during which the development of specific neural circuits and the behaviors they mediate are most plastic and therefore optimally receptive to environmental influences."

So, in non-scientist speak, this means:

Scientists from several different areas have all agreed that:

Environment and biology both have an influence on who we are and what we can do.
We learn based on what we already know.
Street smarts, book smarts, and feelings are closely tied to each other, and all are required for being successful.
We become who we are mostly during specific periods in our early life that can be predicted based on biology.

Here's my question; if we know all of this, then why do we continue to treat schools as a political battlefield instead of a place where we can find ways to prevent people from committing crimes and overcrowding prisons?

Anyone?

Okay, no more pictures.

2007-03-16T12:40:00.000-05:00

So, the decision has been made. I will use this blog not to shill my pictures, but to type words that form sentences that represent complex brain thingies going on inside my cranium.

As for the frequency of posting, your guess is as good as mine. I reserve the right to post when I feel like it and when I have time, and not to when I fail to meet both conditions previously noted. And I will attempt to go against my nature and remain guilt free when I do not post for long periods. It's not like the fate of anyone's world rests on my posting right?

Okay, now for useless trivia of the day:

Dubbed "The Father of Cubism," Picasso was born Pablo Diego Jose Santiago Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno Crispin Crispiniano de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santisima Trinidad Ruiz Blasco y Picasso Lopez on October 25, 1881.

Damn.

Pics? No Pics? New Blog? No Blog? New Photo Site?

2007-03-02T13:54:00.000-06:00

I find myself without clear direction as for my footprint in cyberspace. Once upon a time there was only my photo.net site (photos are here, and member page is here). I posted religiously. Then I got busy and/or uninspired, and posting became sporadic at best.

Then Blogger came along here, and I was a fanatic for quite awhile. Then I got busy and/or uninspired, and posting tapered off.

Now, I find myself with downtime here and there for the first time in a long time, and I want to look at how I am presenting my "extracurricular self" on the Internet.

Yahoo! has come out with what they are calling "Yahoo! 360" which is supposed to be a centralized place for blogging, sharing photos, etc. It's free, and i've started a page just for fun here.

As for Photo.net, I was posting some things there, and noticed another site some of the photographers are using called PhotoPoints, so I created myself a page here, also.

I am trying to decide if I should stick to Photo.net and Blogger, move everything to 360, maintain 360 in addition to everything else, start a PhotoPoints in addition to (or instead of) Photo.net, create my own site somewhere else, or scrap everything and get myself a typewriter.

How about you? How do you choose to represent yourself in cyberspace?

More Pics for Your Enjoyment

2007-02-23T12:21:00.000-06:00

Lotsa New Pictures

2007-02-19T16:28:00.000-06:00

Here are some more new pics. Enjoy!

Corn Maze

2007-01-19T16:40:00.000-06:00

New Picture. You like?

More Spiders

2007-01-16T08:45:00.000-06:00

Here are more spider pics:

Spiders1

2007-01-12T11:43:00.000-06:00

Okay, this is the first in a series of 4 compositions based on two pictures of what I think was a brown recluse spider that crawled out from under my computer desk one night. I enjoy the idea of creating something interesting and aesthetically pleasing out of something most people find creepy and fear enducing.

The Return of Photo Man

2007-01-05T14:01:00.000-06:00

This is the first photo I have spent any real time manipulating digitally and then posting for feedback on my photo.net site since early October. May not be worthy of intense praise, but it marks an important milestone for me; I'm finally making time for my "art" once again. And I had a good time making it, and am looking forward to doing more. I'll keep sharing as I do (whether you want me to or not)!

Here Today...

2006-12-29T14:08:00.000-06:00

I saw fellow blogger Ali last night during her annual hometown visit, along with her hubby. She asked if work was still crazy, and I could hear in her tone that I needed to say yes else I would have no excuse for not blogging more these past months.

The answer is that yes, things are busy, but not in that "God I hate my job" sort of way. I'm actually really enjoying work a lot more these days than I have in the past. Helping design policies, documentation, and the methods for collecting, storing, and reporting data here at the good ol' Kansas State Department of Education is actually very interesting to me. Sick, I know, but I make no apologies for enjoying what I'm doing.

That's not to say, however, that there isn't a crapload of political nonsense, annoying bureaucratic roadblocks, frustrating noncompliant personalities, ridiculous shortsightedness, and all the other frustrations that can make you want to run screaming. But the opportunities to try to improve the system and the possibility (however slight) that it might actually work make these things more tolerable.

Now that I have had a little time to pause and reflect on my current state of affairs, I am aware of that dull ache somewhere in my chest urging me to get creative juices flowing once again. The storyball I've been intermittenly working on since the beginning of November has helped, but the piles of untouched photos sitting on my hard drive are calling to me, and I intend to make time over the coming months to once again start playing with them and trying to create pictures that give me that sense of artistic achievement, whether anyone else finds merit in them or not.

Can you tell I've spent a lot of time doing technical writing and documentation lately? Let me try reprasing all of the above in actual human speak:

Saw Ali. She asked where the heck I'd been and why I haven't blogged. I said I was busy at work. But I like what I'm doing most of the time, so it's okay.

I miss playing with photos, though. Want to do more. Gonna try to make this happen.

Wow, that was easy, wasn't it?

Don't know if I'll be getting back into the blogging or not, but while I had a moment I thought I'd say "Hi."

So, "Hi." How the heck are you?

Spam Email Too Good Not To Share

2006-12-08T13:12:00.000-06:00

If you do not need it, why would you want to grant it? what is the difference between local context and global context? I have tried giving PARALLEL hint but performance does not improve.
sql being called from shell script. I tried playing with Arraysize parameter in the call.
Memory - we used it just fine I'm sure.
The Georgia page is here.
It's been dead for days and no amount of CPR is bringing back to life.
I borrowed my Dad's Shotgun and we brought my revolver as well.
We went out to the Shrimp Creek Hunting Club which is a hunting club that some of Jenny's relatives are members of.
Is there a way to measure CPU consumption saved.
I am a non-violent person who has never been in a fight in my life. Thank you in advance for your time. I imagine that this was due to the heavier bullet weight of the American Eagle compared to the Winchester.
Since P failed, Oracle restored the database back to the point right before it was called. You can find them on the Web, just Google Wild Bill's. The workers there are friendly and seem to be knowledgeable. I wanted to shoot a few rounds of that just to know how much recoil they would have so it wouldn't surprise me if I ever had to use it.
I believe that no one has the right to use force on another except in response to an attack on them. Inspiring awe: an awesome thunderstorm. Alter system - not a chance, that is a DBA thing, period.
The holster, speedloaders, and ammo he's including will be shipped seperately directly to the house. Or, we could extract the table as insert statements and store that in a source code control tool before any changes were made. If not, they'll probably remain in draft form for a few months until I delete them. and it stays in place even when I jog. Pointers to any online Oracle docs regarding this? just gotta conquer that little bit of apprehension.
Oracle goes out of their way to make the database as solid as it can possibly be. that explains why I wasn't invited.
This statement is atomic.
BTW, Happy Halloween.
Now we each have one.

Miscellania

2006-11-21T12:09:00.000-06:00

Greatest thing I've heard on the radio recently:

"Come on by; we have over 400 square feet of inflatable activities."

Midterm Elections:

Yeah for the pendulum beginning it's swing back to the left. Now let's see if the Democrats live down to everyone's expectations.

Corporate Torture:

Why on earth would you hold a week long training on Data Warehousing at a Universal Studios Resort attached to the themeparks, and keep the participants too busy to go and have some fun?

Health:

How in the heck am I supposed to drop 30 pounds when a) there is food EVERYWHERE this time of year, b) it's cold outside and I have thin blood, and c) by the time I have time to exercise, my energy is gone?

The Dark Tower:

Why did everyone hate the last book so much? Does it have something to do with the last 200 or so pages? If so, then don't tell me. And does it make me a total geek that I am REALLY excited about the comic book adaptation that Marvel is going to do?

Heroes:

I Love the show. A lot. Who's with me?

Lemony Snicket:

Does the last book have a happy ending? No, wait, don't tell me. Actually, do tell me. No, don't. He's been telling us from the beginning that it doesn't end well. But he didn't really mean it, right?!?

Signs of Getting Old:

Finding almost no toys that you really want for Christmas. And not being upset about it.

To Be Continued...

MySpace.com

2006-11-14T11:47:00.000-06:00

Okay, quick; someone tell me why I should NOT sign up for a MySpace page; other than the obvious reason that I can't even seem to post on this page nowadays.

Fleh.

2006-10-26T09:43:00.000-05:00

My current favorite word is "fleh."

I made it up.

So far, it's definitions are as follows:

1. Whatever.
2. I don't care.
3. Blah.
4. I feel the need to express myself verbally, but don't really have anything to say.
5. I'm exhausted, and thought I'd let you know.
6. I challenge your assertion in such a way as to allow you no means to rebut.
7. I disagree with your very existence, but not in a very enthusiastic way.

Like Steven Colbert's "truthiness," I hope that the nation will soon recognize "fleh" as an important addition to the American English Lexicon.

So, please use "fleh" at will, and be sure to pass he and his various definitions on to friends, loved ones, coworkers, and people you meet on the street.

Oh, and one more thing;

Fleh.

My Inbox Is Empty.

2006-10-24T11:40:00.000-05:00

For the first time in recent memory, my work inbox is empty. All issues there have been resolved (at least for the time being). I know that this won't last more than a few minutes, so I thought I'd take the opportunity to blog. Actually blog. Real words that I've typed myself.

Amazing, isn't it?

Does this signal the return of Pronemophobia? Will Ted once again have time to post random musings and surf his friends blogs, so that he can comment on their random musings?

Only time will tell.

But for now, I thought I'd at least say, "Hello!"

And now, the little popup window on the bottom of my screen tells me I've just gotten another email.

So now I say, "Goodbye."

The Long Awaited Spam Stream-of-Consciousness Poem

2006-10-23T09:19:00.000-05:00

Here it is, ladies and gentlemen. I've been compiling it for weeks. It is a Stream-of-Consciousness poem made up entirely of the text of spam email messages. Enjoy!

Spam email messages

§ melted into a friend. Well. I'll have no, I'm fah too
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Google Earth

2006-09-29T15:44:00.000-05:00

A coworker just showed me Google Earth; a free application from Google that not only gives you access to live updated sattelite pictures of anywhere in the world, but it links those to all kinds of other information, it lets you "fly" from one location on the globe to another, etc., etc. Probably the coolest thing I have found online in quite awhile.

That didn't involve nudity, that is...

1984

2006-09-27T15:21:00.000-05:00

A friend shared this with me, and so I am passing it along.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HAuZi8ZiJOg

It is very, very scary.

A comparison, for fun.

2006-09-27T12:35:00.000-05:00

Here is USA Today’s coverage of the story involving Pakistan President Musharraf’s appearance on The Daily Show last night.

Here is the New York Times’ coverage.

Not surprisingly, the Fox News coverage looks rather similar to USA Today’s. Identical, in fact.

My favorite comparison quotes:

USA Today: “On balancing the wishes of the U.S. and Pakistan, which is largely anti-American, Musharraf told Stewart…”

NY Times: “The general, whose Muslim nation is a key ally of George W. Bush in the war on terrorism…”

So, apparently you can be both for us and against us at the same time…

Seventy-One

2006-09-26T16:43:00.000-05:00

It is 4:38 in the PM, and since I arrived this morning some time between 8:30 AM and 8:45 AM, I have sent 71 emails. Six of them were to my wife. The rest were all work-related.

I won't begin to attempt a calculation of how many emails I have received.

You Can't Really Be Buying This...

2006-09-19T09:23:00.000-05:00

USA Today tells me that Bush's approval ratings are up to 44%; the highest they've been all year. The article attributes this leap in Dubya's ratings to the falling gas prices and his tooting his own horn on how successful the Republicans have been at fighting terrorism.

Americans aren't really that stupid, are we? We aren't really buying his bull, are we?

Please tell me we're not.

I keep hearing people say that there is no way that we will have another Republican president come 2008, and I'd like to believe them. Not because I'm a true blue Democrat, but because I believe it is time for the pendulum to start swinging back the other direction.

Granted, 44% is still a pathetic approval rating, but the fact that it is on the rise scares the crap out of me.

And I understand that USA Today has it's own slant, and they might be trying to paint the picture a bit rosier for Bush than it really is.

Still makes me sad, though.

I'm a Rock Star!

2006-09-15T16:39:00.000-05:00

So, the coolest thing that happened to me this week is this:

I got an email from a guy in Finland. He found my Photo.net site, and he wants to use one of my photos for his Rock Band's website.

He asked if I'd charge and I said as long as he gave me credit and considered me for an album cover that he could use it for free.

I guess he wants to use one of the Haunted photos like the one above.

I'm a genius in Finland. Who knew?

Dear Mr. President

2006-09-15T15:36:00.000-05:00

Here's what you get if you email the White House:

On behalf of President Bush, thank you for your correspondence. We appreciate hearing your views and welcome your suggestions. The President is committed to continuing our economic progress, defending our freedom, and upholding our Nation's deepest values.

Due to the large volume of e-mail received, the White Housecannot respond to every message. Please visit the White House website for the most up-to-date information on Presidential initiatives, current events, and topics of interest to you. In order to better receive comments from the public, a new systemhas been implemented. In the future please send your comments to comments@whitehouse.gov. Thank you again for taking the time to write.

So, that's what he thinks he's doing?

Continuing our economic progress - I didn't know it had started.
Defending our freedom - by taking our civil liberties away?
Upholding our Nation's deepest values - Who exactly defines these values, again?

Wow. Just wow.

Phil Kline's Memo

2006-09-14T13:18:00.000-05:00

For those of you not in Topeka, someone leaked a long internal memo from Phil Kline to one of his campaign folks. You can read the whole thing at the CJOnline site, but here are some choice quotes:

Some items that need to be addressed on the church effort.

d. Get the pastor to invite 5 "money people" whom he knows can help. As much as possible get the pastor's commitment to attend and to get these 5 people there.

ii. Must have copies of Earl Glynn's report regarding Tiller money.

7. Goal is to walk away with contact information, money and volunteers and a committee in each church.

viii. Get me out. I should not be the last of our campaign to leave an event. Usually we end with a plea for help. Someone from the campaign should stand up and say that they will remain to pick up pledge sheets, etc. someone should be assigned to get me out the door. I am spending too long at these events. Last night went to 9:30. Manhattan went for 2 hours.

xi. If I am not making phone calls and there is a gap; arrange for local grassroots support and lets hit a part of town. I will walk into a restaurant, coffee shop or place where people congregate and work the crowd.

Do not linger on negatives. If they offer why -- receive it and say "sorry you feel that way." And move on.

Must rework Joe Wright and Terry Fox. Must get in their pulpit and have them personally host a reception to match Tiller's blood money.

Should prepare guidance sheet for those who are showing the church video. 2-pager that includes: goals for showing the video, IRS rules guidance regarding what they can and cannot do (this should not take long --no use of church assets -- can show it at church as long as they do not deny opposition of showing their own video -- no need to invite the other, just cannot deny--etc) sign up sheets, how to give money contributions, etc.

Glad to see the clearly defined lines between church and state are alive and well in Kansas...

Despair, Inc.

2006-09-13T13:59:00.000-05:00

Just to tap into the way I am currently feeling about employment, I invite you all to visit the list of "Demotivators" created by Despair, Inc. at the following link:

http://despair.com/viewall.html

To the left is my current favorite.

Work is fun!!!!

Memos from the White House

2006-09-01T12:29:00.000-05:00

A coworker led me to the following link:

http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/nara003.html

It is the "Weekly Compilation of Presidential Documents" published from the White House. I can already tell I am going to have a heyday with them.

In the coming months, I will try to highlight some of the more enjoyable things I find. Here is one from this week:

Memorandum on the Future of America's National Parks

August 24, 2006

Memorandum for the Secretary of the Interior

Subject: The Future of America's National Parks

In honoring its 90th anniversary, I have called on the National Park Service, and every American, to continue the cooperation necessary for our vibrant national parks to endure for the next 100 years and beyond.

Over the past 5 years, the National Park Service has built a strong foundation for the future, with 6,000 park improvements completed or underway. We should further enhance our national parks during the decade leading up to the 2016 centennial celebration.

Therefore, I direct you to establish specific performance goals for our national parks that, when achieved, will help prepare them for another century of conservation, preservation, and enjoyment. These goals should integrate the assessments of the past 5 years used in monitoring natural resources and improving the condition of park facilities. You are to identify signature projects and programs that are consistent with these goals and that continue the National Park Service legacy of leveraging philanthropic, partnership, and government investments for the benefit of national parks and their visitors.

You are directed to consult with the Director of the Office of Management and Budget and the Chairman of the Council on Environmental Quality as appropriate in implementing this memorandum. I encourage you to invite and receive suggestions from those who desire to preserve the scenic, cultural, historical, geological, and recreational values of our national
parks.

You are to report the results of the implementation of this memorandum to me by May 31, 2007.

George W. Bush

Note: This memorandum was released by the Office of the Press Secretary on August 25. An original was not available for verification of the content of this memorandum.

Check out the note at the bottom. I'm fairly certain the original document contained the following postscript:

P.S. - Of course, this doesn't include the Alaska National Wildlife Refuge. Screw all that snow; there's oil in them there hills. Heh Heh.

The Worst is Over... I Hope

2006-08-31T17:06:00.000-05:00

Just a quickie to say that it appears we are on the downhill slope from all of the crazy work bottlenecking that has been going on around here, so I might actually get a chance to post things more than once a month.

In the meantime, let's contemplate how we all feel about the picture below.

Cows Moo with an Accent

2006-08-24T15:04:00.000-05:00

This one's for Kayla.

Violence = Good, Smoking = Bad

2006-08-23T16:28:00.000-05:00

Yahoo alerted me to this little nugget. In Britian, Tom and Jerry cartoons are being edited to remove scenes where animals are shown smoking.

Because we all know that what kids do everything they see shown in cartoons. Just this morning one of my children smashed the other on the head with a huge mallet. And then the other whipped out an ACME portable hole and threw it onto the ground right below where the other was standing, and...

Sheesh. Get a grip, people!

Monday Morning Wisdom

2006-08-21T09:09:00.000-05:00

Here is some wisdom from first graders which has made the rounds via email thousands of times, but they crack me up every time I see them, so I am sharing them with you in lieu of presenting any real thoughts:

While reading, keep in mind that these are first graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

Don't change horses.......................... until they stop running.
Strike while the................................. bug is close.
It's always darkest before................... Daylight Saving Time.
Never underestimate the power of ...... termites.
You can lead a horse to water but ...... how?
Don't bite the hand that .................... looks dirty.
No news is......................................... impossible.
A miss is as good as a ........................ Mr.
You can't teach an old dog new .......... math.
If you lie down with dogs, you'll ........ stink in the morning.
Love all, trust .................................. me.
The pen is mightier than the............. pigs.
An idle mind is................................. the best way to relax.
Where there's smoke there's ............ pollution.
Happy the bride who........................ gets all the presents.
A penny saved is ............................. not much
Two's company, three's ................... the Musketeers
Don't put off till tomorrow what ....... you put on to go to bed.
Laugh and the whole world laughswith you, cry and............................. you have to blow your nose.
There are none so blind as .............. Stevie Wonder.
Children should be seen and not ..... spanked or grounded.
If at first you don't succeed ............. get new batteries.
You get out of something only what you ............................................... see in the picture on the box.
When the blind lead the blind ......... get out of the way.
Better late than............................... pregnant.

Ted Got Busy

2006-08-15T23:39:00.000-05:00

Sorry no posts lately, guys. Very, VERY busy at work. Plenty to comment on, just not enough time to comment on it. Here's a brief summary:

Spider-Man 3 - Oooh, ooh, OOOHHH!!!!!

Work - Agh. Ugh. Ugh some more.

Politics - Grrr. Morons. Grrr.

Life - Wow. Umm... Huh? Oh. Whew! (Repeat as necessary.)

There you have it.

More when I can!

For Those of You Keeping Score...

2006-07-20T11:34:00.000-05:00

According to Hollywood, the amount of time you should let pass before you exploit tragedy for financial gain:

5 years, give or take.

Reference: World Trade Center, United 93

According to Washington, the amount of time you should let pass before you exploit tragedy for political gain:

None whatsoever.

Reference: Everything Bush has said since 09/11/2001

Any Questions?

SuperPsychoAnalysis

2006-07-17T14:27:00.000-05:00

Read an interesting article about superhero mythos and Superman from the UK Times here.

I Was Afraid This Would Happen

2006-07-14T13:11:00.000-05:00

I've lost my audience.

Sigh.

See, you neglect your people, and your people go away.

Sniff.

I miss you, blog people.

But now I can penetrate hardly and give the pleasure to every woman!

2006-07-14T10:12:00.000-05:00

I don't really have anything to say at the moment; I just had to share the subject line of an email I received this morning. It made me laugh a lot.

At Work

2006-07-12T09:05:00.000-05:00

Wondering how things are going at the Kansas State Board of Education? Look here. If you can't get the article there, I've included it below:

Education board examines turnover

By Barbara Hollingsworth
The Capital-Journal

Turnover rates climbed steeply last year at the Kansas State Department of Education.

More than 20 percent of the state department's staff turned over last fiscal year -- far higher than the previous year's rate of about 10 percent.

"I was shocked to see our turnover rate has doubled in the last year," Sue Gamble, a Kansas State Board of Education member from Shawnee, said during Tuesday's board meeting. "In a department this size, to have that large a loss of employees, I think, is dangerous to say the least."

While critics of education commissioner Bob Corkins had predicted such an outcome when he was appointed to his post last year by the state board's conservative faction, the commissioner said much of the turnover took place before he started his job. Corkins was a controversial hire because he had never worked in schools and was known among educators for lobbying against increases in education funding.

But of the 54 workers to leave the department during the fiscal year that ended June 30, Corkins said 18 left in the first quarter of the department's fiscal year -- before he took his post in October.

"More important than the turnover, are we getting the job done?" Corkins said.

To that question, Corkins said changes he has implemented at the department are working well. And board chairman Steve Abrams, part of the group that hired Corkins, said he isn't concerned about the turnover.

"We have some great personnel, and I am excited about what we are trying to accomplish here," he said.

Of those to leave the department, several have been high-ranking or otherwise visible employees. Among them, former deputy education commissioner Alexa Posny -- who had been passed over for the Kansas education commissioner post -- left for a job with the U.S. Department of Education. Former spokeswoman Kathy Toelkes took a job in the private sector, and her replacement, David Awbrey, left last month, citing the contentious political climate and family considerations.

Another former employee, Diane DeBacker, joined Shawnee Heights Unified School District 450 about three weeks ago as associate superintendent. She said her desire to be closer to schools led her away from her job as director of school improvement for the education department. When she left, she was working as interim deputy education commissioner.

"For me, it was the opportunity to return to the local level," she said. "I had spent all of my previous career being in a school district or actual schools. You miss that."

DeBacker said Corkins' appointment didn't play into her leaving.

"I got along with him very well, and he treated me very well," DeBacker said. "For me, that wasn't a factor. For other people I think that it was."

Among those to leave, six retired, 47 resigned and one was dismissed, according to information provided to the state board.

Barbara Hollingsworth can be reached at (785) 295-1285 or barbara.hollingsworth@cjonline.com

I'm Not Dead.

2006-07-10T17:01:00.000-05:00

Just letting you know that I have not fallen off the face of the earth or been abducted by aliens.

I am, however, experiencing workloads and levels of stress at work beyond what I've ever dealt with before, so it leaves me no time to play on the blogs like I usually do when I have downtime at work.

So, hang in there, friends, and when I can, I will be back to share my skewed perspective and provide lame comments on yours.

Later!

Perbe

2006-06-30T16:32:00.000-05:00

A recent entry on Keeley's blog inspired me to advocate for the use of a word that I made up. That word is:

Perbe.

Now, here's why I think we should be using it.

Maybe is a word.
Perhaps is a word.
Mayhaps is a word. Granted, it's a word no one but Shakespeare and second-rate Renaissance Festival actors use, but it's still a word.
If #3 is a valid amalgamation of #s 1 and 2, then
Perbe should also be a valid term.

But, beyond this logical argument, think about actually using it in context. I shall demonstrate:

Boss: "Hey, Ted, are you the one who put the tin foil in the microwave and set off the fire alarm, causing the entire agency to have to evacuate the building at 3:00 on a Friday?"
Ted: "Perbe."
Boss takes the better part of 10 seconds to contemplate the word Ted has just said; trying to determine if it is, in fact, a real word.
Ted has time to flee the scene of the crime.

I rest my case.

Topher Brock vs. Eddie Grace

2006-06-30T12:54:00.000-05:00

For those of you interested in Spider-Man villian Venom, a.k.a. Eddie Brock, and for those of you interested in "That 70's Show" star Topher Grace, here are some photos of Topher shooting scenes for Spider-Man 3, in which he will be playing said symbiotic bad guy.

OHMYGOD OHMYGOD OHMYGOD!!!!

2006-06-29T14:28:00.000-05:00

Just a small note to tell you all that

THE SPIDER-MAN 3 TEASER TRAILER IS ONLINE!!!!!

Go here if you're interested...

This is My Friend Carl

2006-06-28T12:14:00.000-05:00

He usually is wearing something strange, but I finally got a picture of him looking normal.

1200 Curfew

2006-06-28T10:57:00.000-05:00

Today, the music that is getting me through the day is the Indigo Girls' Live Album 1200 Curfew.

Now you know.

I Really Thought It Was A Joke

2006-06-27T11:02:00.000-05:00

When some of my fellow bloggers started talking about this movie, I really thought it was a spoof of some kind. How I wish I had been right...

Snakes on a Plane.

I Am Rowlf!!!

2006-06-23T16:38:00.000-05:00

You Are Rowlf the Dog

Mellow and serious, you enjoy time alone cultivating your talents.

You're a cool dog, and you always present a relaxed vibe.

A talented pianist, you can play almost anything - especially songs by Beethoven.

"My bark is worse than my bite, and my piano playing beats 'em both."

The Muppet Personality Test

Thanks to the Girl in Black for this one!

A Star is Born...Again

2006-06-23T12:56:00.000-05:00

I just got back from watching the Girl Child onstage in a show put on by her theatre camp. You can see the news article that went along with the photo to the left here.

Had another one of those scary parent moments while watching her and seeing just how much she is growing. It's all happening WAAAAAY too fast.

I'm very proud of her. I'm just not ready for her to be anything other than my little girl.

To Balance Out That Last Post

2006-06-21T12:37:00.000-05:00

Which was WAAAY too heavy, I give you:

BAD JOKES

1. Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married.
The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

2. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

3. A jumper cable walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

4. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.

5. A sandwich walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."

6. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

7. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says:
"A beer please, and one for the road."

8. Two cannibals are eating a clown.
One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

9. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home'"
"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
Doc says "It's Not Unusual."

10. Two cows standing next to each other in a field,
Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," said Dolly.
"It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.

11. An invisible man marries an invisible woman.
The kids were nothing to look at either.

12. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says,
"My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?"
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him"
So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What? Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy."

13. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

14. I went to the butcher's the other day.
I bet him 50 bucks that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf.
He said, "No, the steaks are too high."

15 . I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

16 . What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

17 . Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

Drawing the Line

2006-06-21T10:16:00.000-05:00

I am a supporter of the pro-choice movement whenever I can be. I am a member of the Human Rights Campaign and am on the Planned Parenthood email list. I sign petitions and contribute money when I feel the request is justified.

This morning, I received an email asking me to contribute money so that the only Abortion Clinic in Alabama doesn't have to close. And I couldn't do it. For me, there is a big difference between supporting a woman's right to choose and knowing that my money is going directly into funding abortions.

I've always said that, when faced with the choice personally, I don't think I could ever choose to end a life. Even if I don't consider a first-trimester fetus "a human person," I still would have trouble making the decision to terminate. But that does not mean that I would prevent someone else from making that choice.

I've thought this issue through from many different angles. From the angle of overpopulation to the angle of not being comfortable with a child being brought into this world by parents who don't want them to the angle of personal freedom, and I always come out on the pro-choice side.

And yet, I am not comfortable with the idea of my dollars going to keep the clinic open. Maybe it is the notion that, if there are not enough people in Alabama wanting abortions to keep the clinic open, then maybe the clinic doesn't need to stay open. But then I think that maybe it's being forced to close by outside pressure despite a large population who want/need it's services. And then I think about the women in Alabama who would choose to have an abortion and who would be forced to obtain one in an unsafe way if the clinic closes.

Amazing how one little email can throw someone into a huge moral dilemma, isn't it?

What's more, as a rule I haven't been contributing money to any of these causes for quite some time. As is usually the case, I've ended up on several different groups' email lists, so I get multiple emails daily asking for my support. I am always ready to sign a petition or send an email if I agree with the cause, but only contribute actual money on rare occasions.

So, if this email request were for funds to support an ad campaign, or to support a particular candidate, I probably would have deleted it with little or no thought. But because of the nature of the request, I feel guilty that I don't want to contribute.

I'm not going to contribute; I have decided that. I've already thrown the email away. Does that make me a hypocrite?

I'd like to think it doesn't. I believe that one of the biggest problems we are having in our current political climate is that "the other side" believes that their way is the ONLY way, and so they make no distinction between what they would personally choose and what the rest of the world should be allowed to choose. It seems to me that Conservative Republicans and the Extreme Religious Right want to tell the world how it should live, how it should act, and what it should believe. They don't seem capable of saying, "This is what I choose, this is what I believe, but I acknowledge and accept that your choices and beliefs can be different than mine."

So, why, now that I personally am saying that, do I feel two-faced?

Happy Emancipation Day!

2006-06-20T14:44:00.000-05:00

Optical Illusion Tuesday!

2006-06-20T14:07:00.000-05:00

Are you ready? Here we go:

Read this. Now read it again.

This says Optical Illusion.

This says Teach and Learn

This says You and Me

This says Good and Evil

Okay, I'm done now.

Kansas in Times Square

2006-06-19T15:11:00.000-05:00

So, according to this article, Kansas has purchased ad time on the CBS SuperScreen in Times Square. The goal is to convince the world that Kansas is not "As Bigoted As You Think."

Good luck, Kansas.

Back to Nature

2006-06-19T12:36:00.000-05:00

So, this weekend I spent some time being reminded of the power of nature.

Friday night, we went camping. All was good until about 11:00 at night, when the rain and winds set it, and Mother Nature showed how easily she can force a five-person dome tent to lay down flat while two adults, two children, and a dog are still inside. We survived the night, but woke up soaked, cold, and less than rested. Hopefully the next trip will be smoother. Or at least slightly less wet.

Saturday we cut the remainder of our camping trip short because it was too cold to swim or fish like we had planned. Next time, even when the weatherman says it's going to be warm and sunny, we'll take sweatshirts and jeans.

Sunday we were inside most of the day because it was bloody hot. Thank Man for air conditioning.

This morning, the kids and I came out of the house to discover a baby bluejay that had apparently fallen out of it's nest. It was accompanied by two divebombing parents that ensured we didn't get too close, and a couple of housecats that REALLY wanted to have a birdie snack.

The girl child made it very clear that kitties would be in trouble if she came home to a birdie carcass. We'll hope that doesn't happen. From watching Mom and Dad Jay, I'd say it's more likely that we'll come home to cats with lots of peckmarks.

I'll keep you posted...

Dear Mr. President

2006-06-16T15:48:00.000-05:00

I just bought P!nk's new album "I'm Not Dead." Great album. After only having it for two days, it is already my favorite P!nk album.

One song that I felt the need to share with you is entitled "Dear Mr. President." The lyrics follow:

Dear Mr President

Lalala
Lalala lala

Dear Mr President come take a walk with me
(come take a walk with me)
Lets pretend we’re just two people and you’re not better than me
I’d like to ask you some questions and if we can speak honestly
What do you feel when you see all the homeless on the street
Who do you pray for at night before you go to sleep
What do you feel when you look in the mirror
Are you proud

How do you sleep while the rest of us is crying
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held up high
Can you even look me in the eye
And tell me why

Lalalala
Lalalalala

Dear Mr President were you a lonely boy
(Were you a lonely boy)
Were you a lonely boy
(Were you a lonely boy)
How can you say no child is left behind
We’re not dumb and we’re not blind
(We’re not blind)
They’re all sitting in your cells
While you pave the road to hell

What kind of father would take his own daughter’s right away
And what kind of father might hate his own daughter if she were gay
I can only imagine what the first lady has to say
You’ve come a long way
From whiskey and cocaine

How do you sleep while the rest of us cry
How do you dream when a mother has no chance to say goodbye
How do you walk with your head held up high
Can you even look me in the eye

Let me tell you about hard work
Minimum wage with a baby on the way
Let me tell you about hard work
Rebuilding your house after the bombs took it away
Let me tell you about hard work
Building a bed out of a cardboard box
Let me tell you about hard work
Hard work hard work
You don’t know nothing bout hard work
Hard work hard work

How do you sleep at night
How do you walk with your head held high

Dear Mr President you’d never take a walk with me

I meant Rove.

2006-06-16T15:42:00.000-05:00

Rove got off free, not Frist. You know what I meant.

It has come to my attention that I am King of the Comment Killers. Looking at the blogs I frequent, I seem to end up having the last word on a lot of posts with multiple comments on them. I think there are several possible reasons for this:

I have been waiting too long between viewings of others' blogs and end up commenting on posts that are several days old when everyone else has lost interest.
My comments are so mind-blowing and original that no one can think of something worthy to follow.
My comments are so lame and sad that noe one wants to follow them.
The blogger software actually has code written into it to prevent anyone from following a comment of mine with another as part of the Universal Anti-Ted Conspiracy started by the first girl I ever broke up with (which was in fifth grade, if I remember correctly).

So, which do YOU think it is?

Not Cool.

2006-06-14T13:57:00.000-05:00

SPOILER ALERT - If you are a Spidey fan and haven't read Civil War #2 yet, do NOT follow the link below.

Okay, so I just read a piece of news about my favorite Comic Book Hero. The news relates to something that happens in a comic book that comes out today.

Guess who hasn't picked up this comic book yet?

And this "something" that happens is being heralded by Marvel as "arguably the most shocking event in comic book history."

Thanks a whole Hell of a lot, Yahoo! News.

Stream of Consciousness

2006-06-14T11:57:00.000-05:00

Today's entry will be a stream of consciousness.

Frist - Cannot believe he got off scott free. Just disgusting.

I wonder if Betty Ross from the Hulk comics is supposed to be some kind of tribute to Betsy Ross.

My family (who rock) got me a new digital camera for my birthday (which rocks). I have sooo many things I want to try with it. Most of them are legal.

My boss announced this morning that she is leaving at the beginning of August. Very concerned about who might come along after her. Thinking I might want to start paying more attention to the classifieds.

Olive Garden salad is still (mostly) good after it has sat in your fridge for five days.

I really need to clip my fingernails.

I hope my coworker who is scanning surveys is done soon so I can get to analyzing the data that I have to have completed by tomorrow.

If you are interested in digital photography, you should visit http://www.tipsfromthetopfloor.com. Good podcast and info.

Podcasts - Does anyone else find it funny that they have created terminology as though Podcasting is some new thing when really it is just the process of putting digital audio or video files onto portable devices? This technology has been around for quite a while now, it's just getting more popular now. For awhile, I really thought I was missing something because it seemed like it was just repackaging old technology. Now I know better.

Stayed home with an ill child yesterday and ended up watching the last half of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, all of Chamber of Secrets and Prizoner of Azkaban, and half of my new copy of Goblet of Fire. Good times. Really makes me want to sit down with a computer and all of the DVD-ROM special features. I'm such a geek.

Worried about the coming months at work. Aside from this morning's announcement, there is a TON of work to be done, and I have this fear that more of it will fall on my shoulders than is reasonable or fair. Partially due to the process of passing the buck, and partially due to the inability of some to see the full scope of the work involved.

Strange things are in the air.

That is all for now.

Comics are out to turn our kids Gay!!!

2006-06-12T10:05:00.000-05:00

Read all about it here.

Oh, and for more on Batwoman, check here.

Wow!! That's Amazing!!

2006-06-09T15:29:00.001-05:00

Taking my cue from Ali, I present:

Some Interesting and amazing facts
------------------------------
Alaska:
More than half of the coastline of the entire United States is in Alaska
----------------------------
Amazon:
The Amazon rainforest produces more than 20 percent of the world's oxygen supply. The Amazon River pushes so much water into the Atlantic Ocean that ~ more than one hundred miles at sea, off the mouth of the river ~ one can dip fresh water out of the ocean. The volume of water in the Amazon River is greater than the next eight largest rivers in the world combined and three times the flow of all rivers in the United States.

-------------------------------------
Antarctica:
Antarctica is the only land on our planet that is not owned by any country. 90% of the world's ice covers Antarctica. This ice also represents 70% of all the fresh water in the world. As strange as it sounds, Antarctica is essentially a desert. The average yearly precipitation is about two inches. Although covered with ice (all but 0.4 percent of it), Antarctica is the driest place on the planet, with an absolute humidity lower than the Gobi desert.

----------------------------
Brazil:
Brazil got its name from the nut, not the other way around.

-----------------------------
Canada:
Canada has more lakes than the rest of the world combined.
Canada is an Indian word meaning
"Big Village."

---------------------------
Chicago:
Next to Warsaw, Chicago has the largest Polish population in the world.
-----------------------------------
Detroit:

Woodward Ave. in Detroit, Michigan, carries the designation M - 1, because it was the first paved road anywhere.
---------------------------------
Damascus:
Damascus, Syria, was flourishing a couple of thousand years before Rome was founded in 753 BC, making it the oldest continuously inhabited city in existence.

----------------------------------
Istanbul:
Istanbul, Turkey is the only city in the world located on two continents.
---------------------------------
New York City:
The term "The Big Apple" was coined by touring jazz musicians of the 1930's who used the slang __expression "apple" for any town or city. Therefore, to play New York City is to play the big time ~ The Big Apple. There are more Irish in New York City than in Dublin, Ireland, more Italians in New York City than in Rome, Italy, and more Jews in New York City than in Tel Aviv, Israel.
---------------------------------
Wilderness:
Percentage of Africa that is wilderness 28%. Percentage of North America that is wilderness 38%.
------------------------------
Ohio:
There are no natural lakes in the state of Ohio, every one is man-made.
---------------------------
Rome:
The first city to reach a population of 1 million people was Rome, Italy in 133 B.C. There is a city called Rome on every continent.
-----------------------------
Siberia:
Siberia contains more than 25 percent of the world's forests.

---------------------------------
SMOM:
The smallest sovereign entity in the world is the Sovereign Military Order of Malta (SMOM). It is located in the city of Rome, Italy, has an area of two tennis courts, and as of 2001 has a population of 80, 20 less people than the Vatican. It is a sovereign entity under international law, as is the Vatican.
----------------------------------
Sahara Desert:
In the Sahara Desert, there is a town named Tidikelt, which did not receive a drop of rain for ten years.
--------------------------
St. Paul:
St. Paul, Minnesota was originally called Pigs Eye after a man named Pierre "Pig's Eye" Parrant who set up the first business there (bootlegging).
--------------------------------------
Roads:
Chances that a road is unpaved in the USA ~ 1 percent
Chances that a road is unpaved in Canada ~ 75 percent.
----------------------------------
United States:
The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are meant to be usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies.

I Am Two Sixteen Year Olds!!!

2006-06-09T09:54:00.000-05:00

I know that sounds totally wrong, but it is less painful than saying I turn 32 today. But it's true; 32.

I'm actually feeling pretty good about 32. Better than I did about 30 or 31. Life is pretty darn good, and I'm happy with what I've accomplished in the sixteen years since I hit my first major milestone towards adulthood.

Growing up in Missouri, 16 was the magic age; you got your driver's license and became truly independent. Now, 16 years later, I have a lovely wife and two wonderful children, a challenging and financially adequate job, a slew of hobbies to distract me from the stresses of everyday life, a house I love, a dog, two cars, an extended family that provides me support, friends who do the same, and more toys, comics, and fun stuff than any adult has the right to have. I've achieved the American Dream relatively early in life, and still have all the time in the world to see where I can go from there. Why shouldn't I be happy about my birthday, right?

Sorry I've been so remiss in posting. I usually do my blogging at work when there is downtime, but there has been NO downtime at work lately.

I know; I know; it's no excuse. I should really get my priorities straight. I really do feel bad. I just hope I haven't lost any of my seven readers. As a birthday resolution, I make the following promise:

I will try to make sure to get in two or three postings a week at minimum.

But, be prepared, because I think the days of me being able to post daily are probably gone. For the immediate future, at least.

Anyhoo, how are YOU going to celebrate my birthday today? I tried to convince the State of Kansas that it should be a statewide holiday, but they haven't called me back about that yet. Maybe I'll shoot for a Federal holiday, instead...

Miscellania

2006-06-01T12:06:00.000-05:00

A few quick thoughts on this Thursday afternoon before I dive back into my fascinating work developing a software testing plan.

The U.S. Government is asking "leading Internet companies to keep histories of the activities of Web users for up to two years to assist in criminal investigations of child pornography and terrorism." How do you feel about having all of your web surfing for the past two years presented to the government? Read more at USA Today.

I just finished "reading" Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince via audiobook. I've now "read" all the Harry Potter books this way, and highly recommend it. Apparently you're never too old to enjoy having someone read to you. Makes car trips and dog walking much more entertaining, IMHO.

As for the book itself, I really enjoyed the memories it brought back related to first romances and other middle school angsts; even though Harry and his friends are well into their teens as they are apparently first experiencing these things. Fun to remember the scary excitement of first kisses and playing the "does she really like me" game. Although, as a parent, it scares the crap out of me to know that I will soon be dealing with all of these from a totally different perspective with the Girl Child. Yikes.

Kinda disappointed with the ending of the book. Don't want to give anything away, but the events themselves seems somewhat anticlimactic, and the major even that occurs at the end seems somewhat unjustified given everything that has gone before. That's all I'm saying.

Okay, back to work. Happy, happy, joy, joy!

The Polls are Back!!!

2006-05-31T10:59:00.000-05:00

I realized this morning that I haven't asked a Poll Question in a LOOONG time. So, the question for today is:

What was your favorite childhood toy?

Mine would have to be the Charlie McCarthy Ventriloquist Dummy that I took with me EVERYWHERE. He was my best friend. Then I lost him in the fire that destroyed my house when I was in first grade. But then my granparents got me a new one. And my parents got me a deluxe verison where you could actually put your arm in his back and turn his head and open his mouth using a trigger instead of the string on the back of his neck. But then in a desperate need to grow up, I threw both of these (along with a rather extensive collection of stuffed animals) away. And I don't mean I gave them away or sold them; I literally threw them all away. But then several years ago my lovely wife managed to find another Charlie McCarthy dummy and got it for me for my birthday, and to this day he sits smiling at me on a shelf in our bedroom. So there you have it.

New State Quarters

2006-05-30T12:35:00.000-05:00

You may have seen these before, but I thought they were funny.

I'm Not Crazy!

2006-05-26T16:04:00.000-05:00

For years now, I've been trying to come up with some proof that one of my favorite series of toys as a child actually existed. They were called M.A.S.K.; which stood for Mobile Armored Strike Kommand. They were toys that transformed from everyday vehicles to armored and spacey vehicles. The figures were about half the height of Star Wars or G.I. Joes. I played with them constantly.

Well, I finally have proof. Here is the Wikipedia entry on the toys, and here is a site showing some pictures.

And below are the pictures of the ones I had; the Tractor/Trailer rig, the Motercycle, and the Gas Station Playset.

Good times...